How to Tell If Your Partner Is Cheating

Sometimes, no matter how much love, time and effort you give to a relationship, your partner goes astray and finds another. It can be an infatuation or a fling, but whatever the case, it’s still cheating. If you think your darling is having an affair, here are a few signs to look out for.

Phone Calls In The Middle Of The Night

You wake up and your partner is on the phone whispering, and when he/she realizes you’re awake, he/she hangs up and says “it’s no one”, or “just the boss”. Maybe it doesn’t even happen in the middle of the night, but all the time. When the phone rings, he/she always races you to it, always certain the call’s for him/her. When you come near, he/she puts it down quickly. Your partner’s cellphone also always rings or receives messages and when you try to read it he/she grabs it immediately. Cheating partners are always wary when they’re communicating with their other woman/man.

The Last Straw: You listen through the extension, and you overhear that it’s a man/woman you don’t know at the other end. When he/she hangs up and you ask who it was, he/she tells you it’s a friend/the boss/relative.

He/She Is Always Away

A cheating partner is always in inappropriate places at inappropriate times. Oftentimes, he/she makes excuses just to go off and rendezvous with the other woman/man. It can be a business trip, frequent dinners out, or if they suddenly get a new “hobby”. Your partner spends more time out, and less time at home with the family. What’s worse, he/she doesn’t even care.

The Last Straw: He/she forgets and misses important events, such as birthdays and anniversaries. When he/she comes home, you find suspicious and obvious stuff, such as lipstick marks, a strange perfume, or even a hotel brochure, when he/she was suppose to be at the the office all night.

They Groom More

He/she spends more time in the shower, buys new clothes and gets a new perfume. While you think it’s sweet that your partner is trying to look more presentable to your eye, watch out: all that grooming might not be for you.

The Last Straw: He/she buys a new set of underwear, and you find out they’re not for you.

His/Her Attitude Changes

Partners who cheat are always conscious of themselves, because they are afraid you’re becoming suspicious. You ask your partner one simple question and he/she reacts violently, accusing you of nagging him/her. If he or she becomes defensive, it’s likely that he/she is guilty and covering something up. When you ask, he/she refuses to talk, because he/she is embarrassed or ashamed of the infidelity.

The Last Straw: When he/she hits you after you ask him about the issue. It’s also likely that he/she will feel guilty and confess outright.

There’s Less Sex

It’s important for every couple to have intercourse, as it’s the most intimate physical connection or activity they can do together. Lately though, your partner always passes the chance to have sex with you, saying he/she is too tired or not in the mood. This might be true, or it might be because he/she doesn’t find sexual satisfaction with you anymore, but with another man/woman.

The Last Straw: When you DO get to have sex, he moans “Oh, Joanne!”, when your name is actually Michelle.

If You Can’t Take It Anymore

• Hire a private investigator - Ask him to follow your spouse and report his/her activities.
• Do your own investigation - You can investigate things your way. Check his/her phone bills for suspicious numbers. Log on to his/her MySpace and see if there are messages from other woman/men.
• Talk - Maybe there’s a plausible reason behind all the phone calls and the trips he/she’s been taking. Communicate with your partner, and be calm while doing so. Maybe it’ll shed light on things and you’ll find out he isn’t cheating.
• Leave - If you confirmed infidelity, don’t pressure yourself to commit. Leave. A relationship won’t work if there’s no trust.

Cheating happens, but you don’t have to be a victim of it. If you have this problem, reevaluate your relationship. Figure out if you should forgive, or if it’s time to let go.