How to Listen Effectively

Posted on September 24th, 2009 by aileen

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Communication is vital to creating good relationships with others. People are always trying to express themselves. We always want to be heard, but we never want to listen. Here are some tips you can follow to listen effectively.

Focus. To listen effectively, it’s important for you to focus on what is being said, not on who’s talking. Zone out distractions. Avoid thinking of a reply while the message is being said. You won’t be able to completely understand the message if you’re busy thinking of an immediate response.
Don’t interrupt. Let the speaker finish saying his message first then use a few seconds to think of what to say back. If you interrupt the speaker in mid-sentence, he’ll lose his train of thoughts and might not be able to tell you what he really needs to say.

active listening

Find a quiet place for a conversation. If you feel that the speaker has something really important to say, find a place to talk to him. If it’s in your office, close the door a little to have some privacy and turn your mobile phone off or put it on silent mode. Switching the volume down or turning the ringer off of your office phone would also help in making your room conversation friendly. The important thing is to have a comfortable place to talk with minimal or no distractions. This way, you wouldn’t worry about anything and would be able to concentrate more on what the speaker is saying.
Look for non verbal cues. You don’t only listen to what is being said. Non verbal cues would help you understand the speaker better. The expression on the speaker’s face will show you how serious his message is. His hand movements will let you know if he’s nervous or not. Eye contact can, most of the time, tell you if the speaker is telling the truth or not.
Be careful of your non verbal cues. Your facial expression, hand gestures and posture may stop the speaker from talking. Encourage him to say what he needs to say by constantly nodding your head in agreement, putting your arms on the side or on the table to show openness to listen and not making faces while he’s talking. Eye contacts will make the speaker know that you really want to listen.
Avoid prejudices. Preconceived notions block you from listening effectively. Listen with an open mind. Always be ready to accept and understand the speaker’s ideas even if they’re different from yours.

Listening is part of the communication process. Besides from knowing how to talk properly, you also need to learn how to listen effectively. Improve your listening skills by following these simple tips. The ability to listen effectively is a power on its own. As a Chinese proverb says, to listen well, is as powerful a means of influence as to talk well, and is as essential to all true conversations. After absorbing pointers on this article, time for you to learn the Four ways to get rid of an attention hog.