How to be Romantic
Posted on January 1st, 2009 by monsterguide
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Looking to increase your romance and get her to stop saying “I wish you were as romantic as you used to be!”? Then follow these simple guidelines.
How to be Romantic Rule 1: Constantly surprise her by doing small things
Whether you’re showing up to her work with lunch and flowers, cooking dinner early so it’s ready when she gets home from wherever she is, or vacuuming the house while she’s out with friends, spontaneity and surprise are the first key to being romantic. You don’t have to surprise her by buying her gifts, taking her to a fancy restaurant, or flying her to a faraway city (although I admit that would help tremendously). All you need to do is think of something she wouldn’t expect (which is helpful and nice) and do it with a smile. When she shows up surprised and goes “Why were you/are you doing this/that?” just look at her and say, “I just wanted to surprise you.” Works every time.
How to be Romantic Rule 2: Go on official dates, scheduled and all
This may sound like an obvious one, but for those of you in a serious relationship, how often do you actually plan out a date in advance like you did when you two first met? Show of hands…now! I thought so. Once a couple becomes serious, dating goes out the window, replaced instead by just hanging out and deciding to go places. You may say “This weekend let’s go to the zoo!” but that’s still a trip. Find somewhere fun to go, and ask her a week in advance if she wants to go on a date next weekend. By being told it’s a date it’s instantly more romantic than the trip you’d be taking otherwise, and girls love going on dates and being able to dress up in an official, meaningful capacity.
How to be Romantic Rule 3: Make a CD of songs that remind you of her
I can’t begin to tell you how many times my fiancée has asked me, “What songs remind you of me?” Unfortunately I primarily listen to rap, so my library of possibly romantic songs is critically limited off the top of my head. But with a little work (and lots of reminding) I eventually burned a CD with songs I had heard that made me think of her, and you would think I just gave her an Xbox 360 for no reason; she was so ecstatic. Women are very emotional and (unlike most men) tend to project themselves and those they know into situations spoken about by others. If you tell them a song reminds you about them, they’ll actually listen to it as if the song truly were about you and them. It may take a while to find a solid 10-13 tracks which make you think of her, but if you can get it done and leave the CD somewhere where she can find it (perhaps with a booklet with the list of songs and why they remind you of her?) you’re in like Flynn.
How to be Romantic Rule 4: Write, write, write, no matter how bad you are
No matter how bad of a writer you are, the mere act of trying to write something for her is all that it takes. You can write haiku, a simple ABBA poem, or even little notes to leave her throughout the day. One method I’ve found success with is writing very short notes (a sentence or two) the night before talking about how you love her, will miss her until you see her again, etc. and then leaving them in places she’ll find over the course of her day. In her shoes, in her purse’s makeup pocket, on the seat of her car, in her coat pocket, wherever you think she’ll put her hands or look at. If she doesn’t find it right away it’s not a lost cause, as she’ll find it a day or two later and you’ll earn even more Romance Points.
How to be Romantic Rule 5: Mean what you say, say what you mean
If you’re telling her that you love her more than Snoop Dogg loves marijuana, or any number of slightly corny metaphors, make sure it’s sincere. If it’s not, she’ll notice, and what was once an effort to sound romantic instantly becomes a reason for her to question your true feelings. On the flipside, tell her your feelings. Do you tell her you love her whenever you’re thinking you do? Do you tell her you appreciate how she does X or Y? Speak your thoughts out loud (assuming they’re positive) and it opens more communication and romance.
How to be Romantic Rule 6: Don’t worry about looking stupid or uncool
I know that some romantic stuff (especially in public) makes you feel like an idiot. But don’t worry about it. Not only will she love you for it and not even come remotely close to thinking it was foolish, but no one else is really going to be laughing. Women will be going “Awwww!”, and while other guys might snicker, on the inside they’re probably making a note of what you’re doing so they can use it themselves.
How to be Romantic Rule 7: She’s a unique person, and only you can figure out what’s the best course for romancing her
The most important thing to remember: your girlfriend/wife is completely different than anyone else’s. Just because something worked for your buddy Frank at work doesn’t mean it will work for you. Only you know her well enough to truly know what she’ll appreciate, and only you can decide what will or won’t have any chance of coming off as romantic. For example, some women are into country, outdoorsy stuff, in which case an afternoon hike or camping trip would be the ultimate romantic getaway. Other women hate the outdoors, and taking them hiking or camping would only lead to them hating you. Everyone’s unique, and that’s the most important thing to remember when it comes to trying to be romantic with your girl.
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