How to Ask a Girl Out
Posted on April 26th, 2009 by Marck
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You like her so much that you’ve probably spent idle hours in class drawing her face on sketches she won’t receive, writing her poems on notes on love letters you won’t send, and you’re probably making monologues to yourself at night about what exactly you want to say to her. You probably get butterflies in your stomach every time you see her and think of her, but you simply can’t find the courage to ask her out to the movies or hang out at the mall. Here are some tips to help you if you’re having problems asking the girl of your dreams out on a date.
“Hanging Out” and “Dating”
Girls know when you have feelings for them, and it’s pretty much useless hiding them. To make things easier for yourself, you need to draw the line between “hanging out” and “dating:”
- Hanging out means that you’re interested in the girl as a friend. It’s nothing too complicated, since your intention is to make friends with the girl.
- Dating means that you have genuine romantic feelings for the girl. It can get a bit complicated, since both of you will have to define your relationship in a certain way, especially if you plan to ask her out again in the future.
Ask Away
Almost every guy has the tendency to take their imaginations too far and think that every romantic move can be compared to those scenes in movies. The first thing you should do is to take that very creative and romantic thought out of your head, and be more realistic with how you’re going to approach her.
There are two reasons why some guys find it difficult to ask a girl out on a date:
- Pride. Some guys have yet to outgrow their childhood resentment of girls in general, and think that dating gets in the way of more important, more manly things in life. One way or another, you’re going to have to deal with women, so you need to let go of some of your masculine pride and interact with girls the best you can.
- Shyness. You may have been crushing on a particular girl for a while now, but you think you’re not good enough for her. You may even get jittery every time you see her, and you’re at a loss for words when you do get the chance to talk to her in class. You need to let go of some of your shyness if you want to spend time with that girl.
A straightforward, sincere, and friendly invitation to a dinner doesn’t have to be difficult. Here are some tips:
- Look your best. First impressions last, especially for girls. Take the time to groom yourself the best way you can, but don’t make it look like you’re changing your whole self just for one shot at a movie date.
- Don’t make it too complicated. You may have all sorts of cheesy and romantic ideas to ask her out; maybe your thinking of a message in a bottle, filling her locker with roses, or maybe you’ll rent a horse from a stable and ask her out on a date dressed like a knight in shining armor. In the end, all the preparations in the world will still have you asking her out. A simple, “Hey, I have movie tickets, you want to go hang out after class?” almost always gets the job done.
- Expect the best and the worst. Asking a girl out may not lead to instant results. She may think about it, or she may reject you outright, or she may even just go with you. If you’ve invested enough emotionally, remember to prepare yourself for whatever happens especially if you’re serious about having her company.
Asking a girl out does not have to keep you awake at night looking for that perfect way to ask her out. With these tips, you can ask the girl of your dreams out to a night that you’ll never forget… or at the very least, the memory of her holding onto your arm as you both watch the best part of the movie.
Ask a question
on August 4th, 2009 at 8:19 am
Hi Pierre - I agree, it sounds like she is interested! Maybe she has recently gone through a bad breakup or something similar, and that is why she is hesitant? I think the best thing you can do is continue being her friend at work, still making your dumb jokes and being normal while making it clear you are interested, but not as her out as much. If she still knows you’re interested but doesn’t have the pressure, she will let you know when she’s ready!
on August 1st, 2009 at 4:49 pm
Hi there is this girl at my job that I have liked for about 1 year now, she is very pretty smart and funny with a cool personality I’ve been trying to ask her out for a wile but she always gives me a maybe or idk. I think she into me cause she smiles at me all the time her eyes light up she gives me huges constantly and stares in my eyes when we talk and laughs at all my boring jokes. Finally 1 day I tlkd to her and asked her to tell me the truth she says its complicated as to the reason why she dosnt want to give me her number, so I offered her mines and she took it but haven’t called yet. The signs seem to be there but when I ask her to hang she gives me idks and maybes… should I keep asking her out or leave her be eventhough she seems to like me? I mean maybe doesn’t exactly mean no. Sorry for the long story to.